生活大爆炸 第五季:第20集 拉杰相親奇遇記(下)
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Say again? I'm gay.
什么？我是同志
Like... dude-on-dude, but with women?
像...男人和男人，你和女人?
I know a fake marriage isn't an honest way to live, but you of all people should know how difficult it is to come out in our culture.
我知道假結婚不太好，但你也應該知道，我們這種文化背景的有多難出柜
Why me of all people?!
我怎么就知道了
Well, there's a rumor back in New Delhi that you're—how shall we say—comfortable in a sari.
在新德里大家都說你是...怎么說呢，披紗著錦的
I'm not gay! Really?
我不是同志！確定
The chocolate lava cake, the little soaps in the bathroom, and I'm sorry, but you're wearing more perfume than I am.
巧克力熔巖蛋糕，浴室里的小香皂，不好意思，你身上的香水比我還多
That's Unbreakable by Khloe and Lamar.
這是科勒和拉馬爾設計的"情比金堅"
And for your information, it's unisex.
而且是男女通用的
Fill in the blank.
填詞游戲
I love the nightlife... I like to boogie.
我喜歡夜生活...我喜歡跳布吉舞（一種黑人舞蹈）
Got you. With women! I like to boogie with women!
露餡了吧。和女人，我喜歡和女人跳布吉舞
That's disappointing. You were exactly the kind of phony-baloney husband I was looking for.
太令我失望了，我以為你是我追尋的，那種假婚老公呢
Thank you. And once again, my baloney likes girls.
謝謝。再次重申，我的"香腸"喜歡女孩
W-W-Wait! You don't want to put a bite of that in your mouth without trying my homemade Chantilly cream.
等等！你得就著我親手制作的，奶油巧克力醬吃
Yeah, okay, that time I heard it.
好吧，這次我知道了
Oh, dear. Two suns and no sunscreen.
哦，天哪。兩個太陽，沒帶防曬霜
Hello again, Sheldon.
我們又見面了，謝爾頓
What is it now, Tiny Spock?
又什么事，迷你斯波克
I am very disappointed in you.
我對你非常失望
You broke your toy and switched it with Leonard's.
你弄壞了你的玩具，然后把萊納德的換過來
You should be ashamed of yourself.
應該感到羞恥
You're the one who told me to play with it.
是你讓我打開來玩的
If I told you to jump off the bridge of the Enterprise, would you do it?
要是我叫你從"進取號"（《星際迷航》中的飛船）艦橋上往下跳，你也跳?
Oh, if I got on the bridge of the Enterprise, I would never, ever leave.
要是有幸能來到"進取號"的艦橋，我死也不走了
Trust me, it gets old after a while.
相信我，過一陣新鮮勁就沒了
You must right your wrongs, Sheldon.
你必須更正你的錯誤，謝爾頓。
Why? I got away with it. Leonard has his toy, and he's never going to open it, so he won't know it's broken.
為啥？這樣誰也沒損失。萊納德依舊有他的玩具，永遠不會打開，所以也不會知道壞掉沒
And I have a toy that isn't broken.
我的玩具沒壞
Everybody's happy. Well, I am unhappy.
大家都開心。我不開心
I thought where you come from they don't have emotions.
我以為你們那的人沒有情緒呢
I come from a factory in Taiwan.
我從臺灣的工廠來
Now, do the right thing.
現(xiàn)在，做你該做的吧
You know what you are?
你知道你是什么嗎?
Well, you're a green-blooded buzz kill.
就是個綠血的討厭鬼
Perhaps it's time you beam on out of here. Fine.
你該傳送走了。好吧
I will just use the transporter.
我用傳送器好了
Oh, right. You broke it.
哦，對了。被你弄壞了
Very well. Cooper to Enterprise, one to beam up. Energize.
非常好，庫珀家到進取號，傳送人數(shù)一人。充能
Tiny Spock, help.
迷你斯波克，救命
Ready for lunch? Yeah, one sec.
吃飯嗎?恩，等一下
Oh, good. Ma would've killed me if she found out I broke my retainer.
哦，太好了。我媽要是發(fā)現(xiàn)我弄壞牙套，我就死定了
Hey, uh... can I run something by you? It's about Lakshmi.
嘿，能跟你說些事嗎?關于拉克希米的
Yeah, sure.How are things going?
當然，沒問題，進展如何?
We hit a couple of bumps.
不太順利
She lives over in Manhattan Beach, so it takes, like, an hour to get there.
她住曼哈頓，到那得一小時
And she's a lesbian.
然后她是拉拉
What do you mean, "she's a lesbian"?
"她是拉拉?"，什么意思
Well, you know how whenever you and I would try to hit on women in bars and they'd blow us off and then we'd tell each other they were probably gay?
你記得我們在酒吧和美眉搭訕，她們不理我們，我們就說也許她們是同性戀
It's like that. Except this time, it's true.
像那樣，只是這次是真的
Then why did she even go out with you?
那她干嗎和你約會?
She was looking for a husband so she can appear to be straight.
她想找個假老公裝異性戀
And, you know, it sounded crazy to me at first... but I'm actually thinking about doing it.
剛開始我還覺得，這瘋了吧，但現(xiàn)在我想考慮下
Okay, so the reason that might sound crazy... is 'cause it's crazy!
好吧，你開始覺得瘋了是因為...這本來就是瘋了
Look, Howard, you're in a relationship.
霍華德，你有女朋友
You know you have to make compromises.
你有時候也得做出妥協(xié)
Yes, but my compromises are about which bedspread to buy or whose turn it is to do the laundry, Bernadette's or my mom's.
是的，但我妥協(xié)的是，買什么樣的床單，誰該洗衣服，伯納黛特還是我媽
It's a great deal. We both get our parents off our backs, I don't have to come home to an empty apartment every night.
這是件好事，我們都有父母的壓力，我也不用再每晚獨守空房
Plus, once I'm married, I can finally eat carbs again and let myself go.
而且我結了婚就又可以吃碳水化合物，不用擔心變胖了
Why don't you tell your parents you want to try to find someone else? Maybe one who hasn't slept with more woman than you.
為什么你不告訴你爸媽，你覺得這人不合適呢?起碼找個睡的女人比你少的
Because this one wants to marry me. I might never find another one who does.
因為她想和我結婚，我也許找不到，其他想和我結婚的人了
So you're seriously thinking about marrying someone you're never gonna have sex with?
你真的想要無性婚姻嗎?
I can't believe your attitude. I thought you were in favor of gay people getting married.
我不敢相信你的態(tài)度，我以為你支持同性戀婚姻呢
Yes, to other gay people!
是的，但是要同性啊
Do you hear how homophobic you sound?
你知道你聽起來有多反同嗎?
Oh, I don't want a broken toy.
我才不要壞了的玩具呢
Nothing! What? Nothing. I said nothing.
沒什么!什么?沒什么，我說沒什么
That was weird. Really? I don't even notice anymore.
好奇怪，真的嗎? 他怎樣我都不覺得怪了
I cannot believe you guys aren't gonna play with these.
不敢相信你們不玩這個
Well, I told you, you don't. It's mint-in-box.
我說了，就是不能玩，這可是原裝未開封的，
I don't know. I just think it's a waste.
我不知道，我覺得很浪費
Relax. I'm just looking at the box.
放松。我只是在看盒子
Perhaps you should look with your eyes and not your muscular Nebraska man hands.
也許你應該用眼睛看，而不是用，你那內布拉斯加州爺們般的壯手
What is your problem?! My problem is that I don't want you to break Leonard's toy.
你有什么毛病啊？！我就是不想你弄壞他的玩具
Which you probably did by shaking it! She shook it, we all saw her.
說不定你一搖就壞了，她搖了，我們都看見了
Leonard, I bought you this 'cause I wanted you to have fun with it. I don't want it to sit in this box.
萊納德，我買是想你玩得開心，我不想它待在盒子里
You know, you're right.
你是對的
I mean, it's from you, I'm never gonna sell it.
我是說，它是你送的，反正我也不會賣
I'm opening it. Yes!
我來打開吧。好的!
It's broken. What?
壞了，什么?
Oh, nice job, man hands!
干得好，爺們手!
I didn't break it. I guess Stuart sold it to me like this.
不是我弄的啊，我想是斯圖爾特賣給我時就這樣
Yes. Yes, he did. That is a perfectly satisfying and plausible explana... Let's all be mad at Stuart!
是的，是的，就是他，這是個非常完美合理的解釋，大家就生斯圖爾特的氣吧!
You know, I paid a lot for this. Let's take it over there and show him. Absolutely.
我花了大價錢買來的，我們帶過去給他看看。絕對要去
Wait! It was me. I opened your toy... discovered it was broken and didn't tell you.
等等!是我，我打開了你的玩具，發(fā)現(xiàn)它壞了，沒有告訴你
Why would you open mine? I didn't.That was a lie.
你為什么打開我的?我沒有，我撒謊了
I opened my own toy... and it was already broken, so I switched them.
我打開了我的，發(fā)現(xiàn)它壞了，我就換了咱倆的
You should talk to Stuart. I can't, because that was a lie.
那你應該和斯圖爾特談談。我不能，因為我撒謊了
Yours was broken in an earthquake-- and that's a lie.
你的被地震震壞了，我撒謊了
What is the truth?
到底怎么回事?
My Mr. Spock doll came to me in a dream and forced me to open it.
我的斯波克先生玩偶在夢里，強迫我打開它
And when the toy broke, I switched it for yours.
玩具壞了以后，我對調了咱倆的
Later, he encouraged me to do the right thing, and I defied him.
然后，他鼓勵我做對的事，我沒有聽他的
And then I was attacked by a Gorn.
然后，我被戈恩族襲擊了
Okay, that I believe.
好吧，我相信
Leonard, Penny, I just, I want you both to know that I regret my actions towards the two of you. Leonard Penny. That's a lie.
我只希望你倆相信，我很后悔對你倆這么做，我撒謊了
So, is that one mine?
那是我的嗎?
Yes. Well, hand it over so I can open it. Okay.
是的。拿過來我打開它。好
And, Leonard, even though I don't have one anymore, I hope you have fun playing with it.
還有，萊納德，即使我一個玩具都沒有了，我希望你玩得開心
And that's a lie, right? It's a big, fat whopper.
你又撒謊了，對吧?彌天大謊
I hope it breaks.
我希望它已經(jīng)壞了
This is a treat. What brings you guys by?
我好開心。你倆怎么來了?
Raj, Howie told me what's going on with you and Lakshmi.
拉杰，華仔告訴了我，你和拉克希米的事
You told her?
你告訴她了?
I told everybody.
我告訴所有人了
We believe there's someone out there who will love you for you.
我們相信肯定有個真正愛你的人
Actually, we kind of agreed to disagree on that one, but we both think you shouldn't marry this woman.
事實上，這點上我們的意見，還有點分歧，但我們都覺得，你不該和這女人結婚
So, while I'm waiting for this mysterious perfect match who may or may not exist, I'm supposed to just be alone?
那我應該等那個，也許存在也許不存在的人來愛我，我注定孤身一人嗎?
Not necessarily. I think we found someone for you to cuddle with.
不一定，我們給你找了個伴
Oh, my goodness.
上帝啊
Aren't you the cutest little Yorkie ever!
你真是最萌的約克夏!
You got him for me? Her.
你們專門給我買的他?是她
We thought you two would hit it off. I think we already have.
我們覺得你倆肯定合得來，我覺得我們已經(jīng)合得來了
Thank you guys so much. Let's go see if you fit in my man purse.
謝謝你們倆，來看看我的包包能裝下你不
Heterosexual, my ass.
異性戀個屁
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